For a Few Likes More...

Rahul opened his eyes to face a new morning 

He took the first step toward getting into the virtual black hole that he opted to get sucked into voluntarily. He chose a topic and found a WhatsApp group: a holy ground for the pundits of politics to engage in a fierce debate of international affairs.  He took a side which he thought he had points to make. He then made a deep dive into the scholarly debate. Just like popular TV new channel debaters who desire to give the nation an answer, he went full-on. He took on the most forceful debater friend on the group. He chose the contrary viewpoint to this debater friend.  Because of Rahul’s lack of knowledge he had previously shied away from his duty to contribute to the pressing matters of the world on this holy ground. However, this time he came fully prepared with adequate notes. He battled like a soldier on a battlefront and resulted in the surrender of the opposition party.  To date, he had been the least contributor in the group thus people started noticing him and inserting their support to him to take on the hardest debater in the group. He knew underdog gets the most support.  He went so personal that he offended his friend a few times and as a result, the most feared debater quit the group. The same friend unfriended him on Facebook. He felt this to be the collateral damage to the larger pressing cause. He felt bad at heart for losing someone as a friend/acquaintance who did not know him that well. Boy, the day well spent. He made a summary of his thoughts on the issue and posted it on FB. He got many likes. The next day onward he chose another group and another topic. He felt his life was well connected to all his current and past friends. But this had its flip side as well. He felt a constant need (urge) to check every forum for the latest comments, tags, mentions. Also, he got into unnecessary fights with few people. But he had conquered his final digital frontier.

It all happened one day earlier. That day also had started like just another lockdown day...

He was fed up with his locked-in life. In pre-corona days there was the excitement of participating in an enchanting sport of avoiding potholes and avoid getting drenched by holy waters accumulated in them spread on to them by passing vehicles to reach the bus stop. If he crossed this level the next level of challenge was to find a vacant seat during rush hour to reach the railway station. Then started the blood sport of entering a fast local train, survive the crowd, and reach the office. Office politics was another sport in which he had to get involved to validate darwin's theory of the survival of the fittest in the jungle. Finally, he had to repeat the tasks during the return journey. But non-activity of everything except for online meetings and social media made him long for those ordeals.

The first thing he saw was 183 posts overnight in his old college group. 183 was what India scored in WC Final at Lords in 1983.  This group was predominantly US-focused thanks to migration enabled by IT/higher education. Two sets of people were fighting over issues faced in US Elections. Being in India he was unconcerned. But few of his batchmates in India were also in the game too. They say in Hindi: Begane ki Shaadi Mein Abdullah Deewana (Someone gone wild at stranger's wedding). Last night's whats app war had two casualties. Two people had quit the group and others were maybe doing offline efforts to get them back. Admins are like armed forces doctors to revive the lost soldiers for the WhatsApp army. 

Another old school group has lesser posts as it was India based group. It had 140 posts (coincidentally the same score at lords for west indies) and there was 1 casualty yesterday during the Republic TV-style debate. It was later followed by the rejoining of the same libtard who felt the whole group was Andhbhakt. 

On another group incidentally, there was one friend who had withdrawn from that group declaring that he was following electronic distancing from e-virus created by social media. That group was discussing the latest case in Bollywood where journalists were digging graves and making sensational breaking news.

While having breakfast he opened up his Facebook account. He read a few announcements of life events posted by a few friends. Few COVID survivors were posting cakes, songs, poems on Facebook. He appreciated the spirit of this brand of people who kept themselves busy and others engaged. But all their virtual efforts meant not much for him as he was one of few who did not like to post anything about his life or anything on FB. But still, he considered them as COVID heroes as they were doing what they could be trying to remain positive and spreading positivity. This was not something about being an anti-social media crusader, it was about being plain lazy or maybe due to the inherent shy nature of his personality. Maybe he was one of those late adopters ridiculed by those who think about crossing the chasm. 

He started his working day. He had few webex meetings. Some colleagues were discussing world events, debating over the latest viral issues. Some issues were as important as the economic downturn, some as trivial as what a Bollywood actress had said. He felt totally excluded from the people around him.  These days especially after lockdown he was cut off socially from everyone. In BC a(Before Corona) age he had very few close friends, family friends, relatives he used to meet. The lockdown had really hit him hard. His kids were too young so they were a bit scared of the situation. His wife was also not very active on social media. They lived in an isolated bubble. 

By the time, he went to the bed with a resolution to get out of the bubble and adapt to the new reality. He had to get into the mix of the new era forced on him by someone eating a Bat in Wuhan or in a Wuhan lad (there was strong debate online).  He searched Google for finding a guide on how to conquer social media. He had seen a play by P L Deshpande where the protagonist who was very rude, unfriendly, and laconic, transforms himself into a polite, friendly, and verbose person thanks to a book he finds at a streetside vendor stall.   But there was no book like that so he tried to emulate the person he felt to be the most popular friend he had on various social media platforms. He studied the pattern of his posts and participation in various forums. He made a plan and went to bed to face the challenges of the final frontier of his quarantined life.next morning. He had decided to implement a ten-point plan over the next ten days. And this started his digital transformation. 

Thus today after his mighty performance on the digital front he was a man on a mission.  

The next day he went to a famous top-end restaurant in the city and ordered the most popular dish there 'to go' as per current rules. Before he did that he took a selfie in from of the signpost. He then picked up the parcel and served it on the platter. Before they ate, he took a photo of the dish and his family eating that dish. He posted it on Facebook. He got many likes. But he really felt silly doing that.

He then implemented the third point. He had seen many friends performing a song or dance or recitation and post on social media.  He used to sing a then-popular  Bollywood song in his college days. He practiced that and recorded the final performance. Then they finally posted on all forums. He got many likes. He really liked doing that. But he himself admitted that his performance lacked the standard of being published anywhere and also he did not felt that all likes and comments were genuine. 

During the weekend he took out his old bike and went on a cycling tour which was another favorite pastime these days on social media. He enjoyed the tour but taking selfies was a pain. Also, hard labor was a big price to pay for online popularity. But he did that and earned many likes the next week.

Also during the weekend, he coordinated an Online zoom meeting with all his cousins. Some cousins were settled outside India so it was a pain to coordinate a suitable time across various zones. It was fun connecting with all in the family after a long time. Even the seniors had a good time. It was the only activity he really enjoyed without any qualms. but then he had to encash this into his bank balance of likes. So he took a screenshot and posted across social media on Monday to earn more likes. He felt awkward doing that, but he was a man on the mission.  

He had read about another engagement trick. He chose 5 books he liked and posted their cover images. He challenged the most popular friend who had the largest friend-list to post his own set of 5 books he liked himself and asked him to nominate some other friend. This started a long chain and this process earned him many likes. 

During a festive holiday, he had a great opportunity. He got his whole family dressed into traditional attire and took a snap which he posted it on Facebook. He had observed that the visual appeal of a  post was very popular. He won many likes.    

He sent three puzzles to various groups. He had researched these puzzles last weekend from the puzzles site. He got more likes for this initiative, Another advantage was that he could keep his kids engaged for more than two days. 

He compiled his political observations and wrote a long post which he circulated all over. With his renewed popularity he generated charged and emotional responses across the political divide.

Next-Day he cooked a dish and posed its recipe, photo of the dish, and his own selfie while doing it.  This he had seen to be a very popular item on most of the walls around.

He was getting popular each day and his wall was filled with more comments and likes. He spent a significant amount on time engaged with many people across the spectrum. He had successfully broken his digital quarantine in pre-corona days. He met all the digital targets he had planned, He felt to be part of a mass continuum and ethos. Everything felt nice and in tune with the tune to say in another comedy context made popular by P L Deshpande. He had created his own cosmos from the universe of digital chaos around him.

But the Sunday after was a completely different experience. Actually, he had set out on another agenda: a long drive to a popular destination. The picnic went off very nicely with a great climate and surrounding nature.  He had taken a lot of snaps to be posted later. 

At a remote place, he saw three kids doing hard labor.  He watched them doing some digging on the farm for some time. They were resting for some time. Definitely, they were hungry. They only had water to drink with them. He heard the youngest one saying that to others that he was hungry. The eldest one said once he completed the task he can ask money from someone and then they can eat. Due to social distancing, he could not communicate with them but he understood their struggle and pain to survive. Pandemic must have made an impact to make them take up such a hard task. They had carried a sizable amount of packed food. He wanted to offer them. He made up his mind and met them keeping a significant distance and ask him they can share packed food items with them. With some hesitation, they accepted that/ The look in their eyes while they ate and afterward as they proceeded with their tasks was worth a thousand likes. He never thought of clicking that moment, 

The day after he posted pictures of this trip, but he had understood the correct perspective of real-life in the context of virtual reality and the digital bubble we all live in. The real likes from the hungry kids he fed were very different than all the likes he had earned virtually. 

(A Hitchhikers Guide to the Popularity on the Social Media for the Digital Cowboys)